Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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i like turtles

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Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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