these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops