What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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