Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

What is Green and smells like Yellow Paint Green Paint

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

autistic kids rock

Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

H2O corndogs running around naked CC

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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