a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

9/11 my birthday

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

wormly wormly sat on the worm theworm said wormly and went to warmly

What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

David Cameron

dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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