what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What do you call a baby that got hit by a train? Thomas

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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