Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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