Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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What did the black father get his child for Christmas? A Yo-Yo. Actually, never-mind, he doesn't know his father.

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What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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How does Hitler like his juice? With pulp

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What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

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What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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