Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

thumb_up thumb_down -16

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats brown and smells bad poo

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the man move away from me because he thought that i had crabs as pets

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walks into a bar. Ow

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops