You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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knock knock... ...no answer

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your no better than a cockroach

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

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how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops