How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

What was Hellen Keller's dogs name? dhfgbvskjne How did Hellen Keller's dog die? Natural causes.

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

a black man walks out of popeyes

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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