Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

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Joke- Blah Blah Blah, punch line -LOL -Shut the hell up

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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