Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

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ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

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What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Yo Mama just died.

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

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What was the baker a coward? He didn't have the "Bunz" to prove it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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