How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

What happened to the chicken that crossed the road? It got ran over by a car!

Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

Q - Why did the baby spit out his dummy? A - Because i stabbed him.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

no.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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