A man was shot. He died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

man, i read a lot but the are some words i can pronounce

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

Women's Rights

What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

My mom

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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