#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

if life hands u melons, make melonade.

A black guy and a white guy are walking down the sidewalk. As it suddenly begins to rain, what does the white guy say to the black guy? Nothing. They did not know each other.

how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

Mooses

Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

Go online. why? To get a quote. why? To save money. why? Because we said so! Parenting can be hard. See how easy it is to save with GEICO.

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy, she has no arms

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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