roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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