Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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