I have an idea! You leave.

once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

Q. What did the chicken do when it lost its egg? A. It went to go look for it. Q. Why was the chicken scared of the duck? A. Because it was chicken Q.Why can't chickens fly? A. Because they don't want to Q.Why can't chickens swim? A. Because they don't want to Q. Whey do chickens cluck? A. Because they want to Q. Why did the chicken jump on top of a car? A. Because it knows how Q. Why doesn't a chicken have hands? A. Because it's not human Q. What did the chicken dream about? A. Chicken dreams Q. Why was the chicken lost? A. Because it wasn't found Q. Why wasn't the chicken afriad of the dog? A. Because the chicken was blind Q. Why doesn't the chicken know how to drive a car A. Because they don't need to

To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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