how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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