why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

Your face is hilarious.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

Mogok Papiti.

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

A blind man walks into a library.

A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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