What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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