Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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For every person with a broken heart, there is another person out there with a stapler <3 And that person really needs to staple their math papers together so they can turn them in.

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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123 f*ck off

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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