Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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Not even I believe you will ever know yourself that well ever Nero, you see what you created as a false illusion, as all of your, or rather our effort for nothing, as a pathetic attempt to create heaven on earth. In my eyes, you succeeded in doing so, and if it where for you, or more people such as yourself and I, it would have lasted, stop trying to give people what they do not deserve, and remember that making others happy will never cure the sadness and pain deep within you, only cover it. Stop fleeing from yourself, stay, get to know yourself.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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What do you call a kid that hasnt passes 7th grade? A 6th grader

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What would you get when you cross a bear and a shark? a highly improbable situation because sharks and bears live completely different environments.

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Why did hitler kill all the Jews? He is racist

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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