How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Two parrots were sitting next to each other. One parrot said "hey" The other parrot replied "hey" therefore making the first parrot say "hey" which made the other parrot say "hey" again making the... this conversation, comprised of just one word lasted a very long time. aproximately 16749 hours.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

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Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

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Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

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the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

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Camerons hair is Curly..

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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