Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What happens when a super saiyan eats a fully grown pineapple? hehe xd

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -36

the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

thumb_up thumb_down -38

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

New mission: refuse this mission

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops