A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

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this website is a bad joke

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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ilglsdfbvklwbkvbsjklgvsdgbvilsdbklvbwdjkbvwdfseghrfvuowebg

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Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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Emily Walker.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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