Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

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Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: *Leaving the cinema* Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

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How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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call me maybe.

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1 error prohibited this post from being saved There were problems with the following fields: * Body can't be blank

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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dyslexics of the world untie!

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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I run, but I have no legs. I see, but I have no eyes. What am I? A prospective result of future medical advancements that allow the disabled to live normal, healthy and fulfilling lives.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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How are black people and apples the same They both hang from trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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