What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Your're racist.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

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What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctors? It didn't because cookies are Inanimate and are incapable of mobility

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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