Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +1

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops