There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Watch me shoot you

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops