Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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What's funny about a black person, a Jew, and a mexican's graves being side by side? Nothing.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops