Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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Are you still trying to turn me on or something? Well its not not working. Anyway, what is yogurt? So I am eating dead bacteria here? Ifs so strange I feel like I have known you my entire life.

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops