Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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Whats worse to see 100 dead babies on the bed of a truck or 100 fake babies falling directly from the empire state building... I don't know I have never seen either but if you could tell me if you saw it maybe i can use my imaination!!!

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There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

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If i knew people where coming i would have trimed my antlers

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"How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door." "How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door." "The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which one?" "The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator." "There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat." "You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting."

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How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

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Knock, knock. Whose there? Me. Leave.

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Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

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Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Who do you call when you see a ghost on the street? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!! no, ghostbusters are not real, you call the police

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Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a black man was chasing his dinner.

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What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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