1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am ADD Bird

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Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

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what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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there were 2 black men and a mexican man in a car. who as driving? we cant tell from the problem but is is more likely it is a black guy because there are 2 of him and 1 mexican.

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"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops