Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

joe galasso from plainview ny

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

Steve Jobs is alive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

Knock knock Fuck off!

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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