But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why was the black kid in the AP Calculus classroom? Because he was a very driven student, who studied hard so that he could attend a good University and build a good life for himself and his family.

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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