A seal walks into a club.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

Male leadership.

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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