How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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what is the difference between the number 2 and the number 5 3

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A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

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How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

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Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

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Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

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Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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what word starts with the letter N and ends with the letter R that you never wanna call a black person? Neighbor

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This is a bad anti-joke. Just kidding, it's a good one.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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