Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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