Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He was dead. Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He got hit by the first one. Why did the third koala fall off the tree? He thought it was a game so he joined in.

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Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

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In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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Sam: This math homework is gay. Cory: You should pursue a romantic relationship with your gay math homework.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

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What did the vegitarian order for brunch. VEGITARIANS DONT BELIEVE IN ICE CREAM>

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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The bears will win the Super Bowl

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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