Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Why is the sky blue? Because it is

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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