~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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antonis sister is mighty fine

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why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

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Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

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You wanna see something really scary?

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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Q:Whats the hardest part about eating a vegetable A:The Wheelchair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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