why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

your period is red your waffle is blue find a way to fix it or no sex for you!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

YOU'VE WON A FREE IPAD!!!!! PRESS CTRL+W TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops