what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How does a printer work? You plug it in.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

thumb_up thumb_down -1

People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sally cross the road? Because a rapist was chasing her

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing, because they clearly never made contact with each other, owing to the fact that Osama was born approximately 13 years after Hitler had committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -1

3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Well... My reputation is still kinda exaggerated apparently. What you experienced is called astral projection, some people claim it is the same as lucid dreaming, I beg to differ, the difference is vast. You basically just admitted that people believe much more in you, than you believe in yourself, without believing hypnosis does not work, people are like "bah its just suggestions", its true, but underestimating the power of suggestions is a pretty bad call.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why were maddie and maddy and rachel and jill all friends? we all enjoy pizza

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops