why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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h

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cats, swimming, northpole ,sky, park , tree , bench, anti joke. shut up you have a skin disease!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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