Your gay

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? He thought he saw a ghost.

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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