hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

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While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

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"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

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My grandma once told me " never trust the blacks"

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We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

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Your Mum is soo fat.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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