Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

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How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

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You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

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Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

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what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I don't eat pizza

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

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A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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Whats a frogs favorite year? 2009!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops