A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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What do you call a room full of jewish women with yeast infections? The waiting room of a gynecologists office, potentially in some sort of Jewish district

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am ADD Bird

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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have you ever tried Ethiopian food? neither have they

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what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

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what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Q: What cant you give a black guy? A: Black eye, lips, and a jon

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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