What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

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why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

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Why do cows have bad hand writing? because they don't have thumbs

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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Why is my penis rainbow colored?

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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