Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

*knock, knock* "Who's there?" *knock, knock* "Who's there?" This went on for hours, as man 1 was deaf, and man 2 was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops